Lessons in Spontaneity
As a coach, I'm always encouraging my clients to set goals and plans for the future. This has been something I've done myself for a long time - planning my years, months and weeks ahead. What this can often mean is that I plan everything down to the fine detail, leaving little room for being impulsive or spontaneous. I realised recently that this has meant that I've forgotten the joy and fun in being impulsive and in allowing life to throw things at me.
And while I try to plan and arrange things as far ahead as possible, naturally, life doesn't always work the way you want it to, sometimes leaving me feeling disappointed when things don't happen as I might want them to. Now, I've been forced into taking yet another step back and reassessing this behaviour. Yes, it's good to have goals and plans. But it's also good to recognise that it's not always the achieving of them that makes life so rich and full. And it's good too, to recognise that sometimes, it's the distractions that can take us along the path we should be going.
So, this month (August), I've been practically forced into behaving in an impulsive, and some might say, irresponsible manner right from the start! I've been offered a very cheap diving holiday (and you all know how much I love diving).
The only catch was that it was to leave in two days! Initially, I said no. I couldn't possibly. I had commitments and responsibilities. But the more I thought about it, the more I realised that taking some time out was exactly what I needed to do. Leave behind the technologies that can often bog me down, and the paperwork that's overwhelming me and take some time out to reconnect with myself.
I usually plan my holidays months in advance, so the idea of taking one at such short notice was quite scary. I've done it before - booked myself onto a flight to Skiathos at a day's notice, but that was 12 years ago. Surely now, as a responsible adult, and business owner, I shouldn't be taking such risks?
It didn't take me long to change my mind. I had begun the conversation very closed to the possibility, but once I was open, I realised that this was an opportunity that I needed to say yes to. Some might say, it happened for a reason. Others might say it was coincidence. All, I know is that, whatever I get from the holiday, it's reminded me that I need to be much more open to what's out there and learn to leave some more of my life to chance.
Practice Sponateity
- Plan ahead by all means - I know I still will - but leave yourself open to other possibilities at the same time.
- Behaving impulsively can be fun. It can remind us of the childlike joy we used to experience as children. Do something just for the joy of it and remember what used to make you laugh and giggle!
- It sounds like a contradiction, but why not plan yourself a day to be spontaneous. Leave your diary free and do whatever the mood takes you at the time.
- So often we say automatically yes or no to things without thinking about our motivations for doing so. It's often because we feel that we ought to or should do. Next time you are presented with an opportunity, give yourself a chance to assess your true reactions, rather than what you think you should say.
- We often say yes to things to please other people. Practise saying yes to please yourself.
- We often take our lives so seriously that we forget about fun. At the same time as looking ahead to the future, remember to be enjoying the present as well.
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